I Was a Pre-Teen Werewolf or Deals with God Don't Work

Have you ever tried to make a deal with God? Most people have in our modern society with all of our modern issues. Did you come to find out it didn’t really work? Yeah, that is most people as well. Let me tell you a story:

When I was 8 years old, a neighborhood bully tormented me regularly. He liked me especially because at the time my dad was a cop. Tommy was bigger and meaner than all the other kids on our block, and although he only hit me once I was pretty terrified of him. Furthermore he had me in a bind because he also threatened to beat up my sister, who was at the time my closest friend. So, too scared to talk to my parents and afraid of the impending doom that was every morning that summer I tried to play sick. My mother, who could always see right through me, did not let me play sick for long… and it seemed I had no choice but face the terror that was Tommy. That night, I actually tried fasting at dinner. I had no idea what fasting was, but I had overheard my parents talking about it because of a sick friend. It seemed to me that it was a good idea to not eat and pray about something, especially when my mom had made a vegetable medley including mushrooms that night. Unfortunately my mom did not understand how important this was, and made me clean my entire plate… eww, mushrooms! Later that night after my parents had tucked me into bed and my dad left for the night shift I decided to give God one more chance. I got out of bed, got on my knees and prayed with all my might that God would save me from the evil bully Tommy. I prayed so hard… I prayed for safety, I prayed that he would see the error of his ways and start being nice to me. Most of all, I prayed if nothing else God would give me the power to turn into a werewolf, break into Tommy’s house a few doors down, and let me kill this evil bully. I promised if God gave me this power I would only use it for good, after that night. To my disillusionment, God did not grant me the power of the werewolf that night. And to my knowledge, he never has…

You see deals mostly come out of haste or necessity. And even when the deals aren’t as silly as those of an 8 year-old, they still might be silly! We don’t always know what we need, and we really never know what is coming around the bend. Sometimes the things that seem so important now… are not that important later. Sometimes, we need to go through certain things (even bad things) to become the person we need to be later on. Maybe your idea of a deal with God is not out of fear, or being a dumb kid. It could be the deal you try is even out of selflessness or to help someone else. But we need to remember that God is not some overpriced lawyer we can negotiate contracts with.

There have been too many references to God as just some guy on our level; you know the “buddy Christ” type of God. The fun-loving hippie who is just one of the guys. Not true, look it up… and show some reverence.

The funny thing is, every time I hear someone talking about cutting a deal with God; I chuckle and try to think of myself as an 8 year-old werewolf boy. Now you can too!